pimg src=///C:/DOCUME%7E1/W.TEC/LOCALS%7E1/Temp/moz-screenshot-1.jpg alt= / /ppOn Christmas eve, I wasbr / visiting someone that brought a message from London for me, despite notbr / liking visiting the Island especially on Christmas eve. Well, Thebr / Activist had to do what she had to do. I mad my trip, I was runningbr / late so I had to take a commercial motorcycle popularly called Okada inbr / the Western part of Nigeria./p pWebr / proceeded in our journey. I noticed the rider was trying to tell mebr / something but if I tried to inquire, he would just look on. He, at abr / point shifted into my laps and I had to move back while wondering if hebr / didn't have enough space to sit to begin with. Before I got to my stop,br / he looked back and asked me if I was crazy! What? I was still trying tobr / digest that unbelievable utterance when he dropped another one. He saidbr / quot; I want to kiss youquot;!/p pNowbr / imagine if I had not known what to do or how to handle a maniac likebr / the rider, things could have got worse. He might be a rapist. Thebr / stereotype would let us believe that women are emotional meaning thatbr / in that situation, I should just give into crying and get confused. No,br / handled it right. I asked him to halt infront of a police officer andbr / the rest was history.../p pAnotherbr / incident that I would like to share happened in December 2007, a yearbr / before this rider's incident (not on Christmas eve though). I was on mybr / way to see a doctor because I had taken ill. I had to get off at a busybr / place called Oshodi in Lagos to take another bus to my destination. Asbr / I was making my way through the crowd, a guy just grabbed my butt!br / Well, when I turned back with reflex action, I had given him 3 dirtybr / slaps before I calmed down. I didn't bother waiting to see who wouldbr / sympathise with me since my voice was too weak to alert the nearbybr / police officers. If I didn't leave the scene on time, the Oshodi boys,br / would give justice to the quot; butt grabistquot; and embarrass me. I know howbr / they operate so, I didn't wait but I defended my self before leavingbr / the scene/p pThebr / Oshodi incident happens to a lot of ladies in our big markets in Lagos.br / There are all sort of harrassment from the male marketers. They pullbr / you and rough handle you while pretending they are marketing theirbr / goods and all. So many other incidents that I can't begin to name havebr / being endured by women and girls.a href=http://www.defendu.com/wsdi/principles.htm /aa href=http://www.defendu.com/wsdi/principles.htmRape/abr / cases that can be avoided, violence against our bodies by those webr / trust with no one to help. So, since we have got ourselves, what do webr / do?/p pThis brings me to what I believe is a must for every woman and girls to learn a href=http://www.safetyforwomen.com/Self defense skills/aa href=http://www.safetyforwomen.com/./a/p p /p pem quot;...If you see or sense problems on your way,br //em/p pem just change your route and - prepare to run orbr //em/p pem defend yourself...quot;/em — Caroline Young/p p/p pWhatbr / does self defense mean to us as women? In my organisation, we had abr / summer camp in Technology for female secondary students last year. Onebr / of the acitivities at the camp was to bring expert in martial arts tobr / teach the girls little but effective self defense they can use to getbr / themselves out of any a href=http://www.safetyforwomen.com/preparing.htmdanger/aa href=http://www.safetyforwomen.com/preparing.htm./a Did they love it? Did we feel happy to have initiated this? Oh yes!/p p/p p “Self-defence is what we do to make our lives a href=http://www.thefword.org.uk/features/2002/04/fighting_back_self_defence_for_women_girlssafer/a/p p on a daily basis. ” It’s about taking control of/p p situations in which you’re to be made a victim -/p p this ranges from comments to physical attack./p p It’s realising that if someone does not respect your/p p boundaries, you should stop them. There are/p p many different strategies for this - saying something,/p p yelling, leaving, fighting - the important thing is you/p p a href=http://www.googobits.com/articles/p2-1254-basic-selfdefense-for-women.htmlDO SOMETHING/a!/p p/p pBy learning some basic principles of self- defense, as a woman, you are already in control. There are articles you can a href=http://www.googobits.com/articles/p2-1254-basic-selfdefense-for-women.htmlread up/a if you click on the links I provided or better still look for a self-defense or martial art expert to put you through. Not only you but your daughters, your female friends, your sister, our mothers and your female colleagues/p p/p pInbr / this 2009, I will be happier to see a violence free year. I know thisbr / is possible. Let's us all make it difficult for hoodlums, assailants orbr / whatever logo or names they bear to get to us. It's our responsiblitiesbr / to be safe. Let's self-defense skills be one of our safety cateria forbr / 2009/p

pAfter watching the movie Hostel:br /Andy: The moral of that story is; if they can't spell hotel right, don't stay there./p pAfter Rudy asked what I thought of a certain type of drum sticks for his drum set:br /Jen: Drum sticks? If they aren't covered in chicken flesh, I'm not interested./p pWhile eyeing Missy's fuzzy blue socks:br /Rudy: Your socks look comfy! Can I rock em real quick?/p pWhile staring at my slouchy sweater with the big floppy turtle neck:br /Yuna: Mom, why is your hood on the front? How are you gonna put it over your head like that?/p pWhile listening to Kayla whine for something:br /Yuna: Mom I have an idea! Why don't you put a piece of candy in her mouth? It'll close it all up! She won't be ABLE to whine!/p pAfter having a discussion about China:br /Jen: Do you know where China is?br /Kayla: In my big girl underwear!!br /(Yes, she thought of something that sounds similar to quot;Chinaquot;)/p pDuring breakfast on a weekend Rudy had to work:br /Kayla: Heeello!!! Daddy? What are you doing?br /Surprised to hear her talking to Daddy when he wasn't there I look over to see her holding a piece of bacon to her earbr /Jen: Kayla? What are you doing?!/p p..../p pa href=http://www.jennifersuarez.com/Journal/index.cfm?currentMonth=1amp;currentYear=2009#601uClick here to read the rest of this blog at www.JenniferSuarez.com/u/a/p

pa href=http://www.nytimes.com/2008/12/23/health/23beauty.html?partner=permalinkamp;exprod=permalinkSome Hidden Choices in Breast Reduction/a by Natasha Singer, which is most insultingly a part of iThe New York Times'/i The Price of Beauty series, explored the different options women are offered - and not offered - after a mastectomy. I'm sure that readers will be shocked - shocked! - to hear that women are not always informed of the different types of breast reconstructions available because some procedures are less profitable for doctors and hospitals than others. Profit above women's health? Who wouldda thunk it? Sigh./p pThe other problem is that many doctors are not proficient in alternate types of surgery, thus limiting women's choices. In this instance, the article points out that doctors don't tell women that there are other options, preventing them from seeking surgeons who do know how to perform them. What? Self-interest above that of the patient? Who wouldda... never mind./p pOf course, the biggest problem of all is that many women aren't told they have any reconstruction options:/p blockquotep Only one third of women undergoing operations for breast cancer said their general surgeons had discussed reconstruction at all, according to a study by Dr. Alderman of 1,844 women in Los Angeles and Detroit that was published in February in the journal Cancer./p p“In the big picture, it would be great if we could just get doctors to tell people they have an option of reconstruction,” Dr. Alderman said. /p/blockquote pYes, that would be nice, wouldn't it? Incidentally, the presentation of options to women with breast cancer also is impacted by the ethnicity of the patient. Cord Jefferson at a href=http://www.stereohyped.com/few-black-mastectomy-patients-opt-for-reconstruction-20081118/Stereohyped/a comments on a study reported in Novermber 2008 in iUS News and World Report/i that:/p blockquotep Black women are 47% less likely than other women to undergo breast reconstruction after having a mastectomy... African-Americans have fewer referrals to plastic surgeons, and if they do have a referral, they have a lower rate of going to those referrals. Strangely, even once they see the plastic surgeon, reconstruction seems to be offered with less frequency. /p/blockquote pFurther, it is important to note that they itype/i of reconstructive surgery performed can impact the effectiveness of subsequent radiation treatment, according to a study cited at a href=http://hypography.com/forums/news-in-brief/17497-type-breast-reconstruction-impacts-radiation-therapy.htmlHypography/a, a science website. In fact, Hypography reports that:/p blockquotep For breast cancer patients who underwent a mastectomy who undergo radiation therapy after immediate breast reconstruction, autologous tissue reconstruction provides fewer long-term complications and better cosmetic results than tissue expander and implant reconstruction, according to a study in the November issue of the International Journal of Radiation Oncology*Biology*Physics, the official journal of the American Society for Therapeutic Radiology and Oncology. /p/blockquote pOne guess which is the most commonly performed reconstructive surgery? (Hint: it involves implants...) Obviously, given the unique circumstances of every brest cancer patient, not everyone will benefit from the exact same procedure, but again, it would be good to hear about the full range of options, wouldn't it?/p pThe iTimes/i notes that approximately:/p blockquotep 66,000 women in the US underwent mastectomies in 2006... and about 57,000 women had reconstructive breast surgery last year, according to estimates from the plastic surgery society. For many of these women, the operations were more about feeling whole again than about restoring their appearance. /p/blockquote pWhich brings me to my beef with categorizing this article as one about beauty. I understand that technically, replacing a breast is not medically necessary. Yet the article acknowledges that most women are not doing this for reasons of beauty. American women live in a culture in which our breasts are a large part of what makes us women. While that is appropriate or not as a standard for being considered female, at this point breasts are a critical part of gender identity for many. With that understanding, it is absurd to call reconstructive breast surgery a mere beauty procedure./p pMMM at a href=http://doublewhammydiary.blogspot.com/2008/12/whos-telling-who.htmlMage's double whammy diary/a is also offended by the title:/p blockquotep The title of the article is The Price of Beauty: Some Hidden Choices in Breast Reconstruction. I find this so irritating. I'm still struggling to articulate exactly what all the issues related to losing a breast are, so it's hard for me to write exactly why this is so galling. It feels misleading, dismissive, and minimizing. It seems to reduce the issues around post-mastectomy breast recontruction down to vanity./p p...if I was reading the New York Times on paper right now, instead of on-line, I would take the biggest fattest sharpie I could find and cross out, The Price of Beauty. In it's place I would write a more truthful, more accurate and more controversial title./p pThe Price of Capitalist Health Care: Hidden Choices In Breast Reconstruction. /p/blockquote pI could not say it better myself./p piSuzanne also blogs at a href=http://cussandotherrants.comCampaign for Unshaved Snatch (CUSS) amp; Other Rants/a. Her first book, a href=offthebeatensubwaytrack.comOff the Beaten (Subway) Track/a, is about unusual things to see and do in New York City./i/p

pCaroline Kennedy (Schlossberg) has been in the media spotlight for most of her 51 years,but for most of those years, the press has maintained a deferential distance. Now that she's declared her interest in becoming the junior Senator from New York when Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton is confirmed as Secretary of State, political reporters are struggling to adjust their lenses. And Kennedy, who has spent most of her life trying to stay in the shadows, seems to be stuggling to adjust as well./p pFirst, there's the matter of her name. The Columbia Journalism Review's Megan Garber a href=http://www.cjr.org/campaign_desk/caroline_or_change.phpnoted /athat Kennedy's emergence as a political figure made many news organizations forget their own rules of atrribution:/p blockquotep Now that Caroline seems to be embracing her Kennedy side—which is to say, her political side—the media a href=http://www.latimes.com/news/printedition/front/la-na-caroline18-2008dec18,0,3376981.story target=_blankhave/a a href=http://www.nypost.com/seven/12082008/news/politics/bloomberg_praises_caroline_kennedy_143245.htm target=_blankbeen/a a href=http://www.nydailynews.com/news/politics/2008/08/26/2008-08-26_hillary_clintons_speech_could_be_a_gamec.html?page=0 target=_blankengaging/a a href=http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/12/22/AR2008122201293.html target=_blankin/abr / a bit of selective amnesia when it comes to that whole, politicallybr / inconvenient Schlossberg thing. (Schlossberg: not too sexy-sounding.br / Not too Christian-sounding. Not too Camelot-sounding.)/p /blockquote p[Camelot -- the nickname for the John F. Kennedy presidency -- was itself a media myth of her mother's making. Shortly after Pres. Kennedy's assassination in 1963, In an interview for Life magazine, Jacqueline Kennedy a href=http://www.arlingtoncemetery.net/jbk.htmtold/a writer and family friend Theodore White that the fallen leader loved the popular musical about the legend of King Arthur so much that he'd been listening to the cast album every night in the weeks before that fatal trip to Dallas.]/p pAnother CJR writer, Jane Kim, thought the political press was still gripped by the Camelot mystique in their first articles about the prospect of the torch being passed to Caroline:/p blockquotep[Washington Post media critic] Howard Kurtz a href=http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/linkset/2005/04/11/LI2005041100587.html?hpid=topnews target=_blanksays/abr / that the media are secretly glad about the Kennedy news, and that they,br / “quite frankly, want David Paterson to name Caroline because they lovebr / celebrities and are enamored of family dynasties.” Does the lovingbr / accusation stand? Today’s coverage shows some fawning over thebr / reclusive Kennedy, but some strong skepticism as well./p /blockquote p Kim thought the New York Times was doing the best job of maintaining that skepticism.Indeed, the Times pressed Kennedy on her reasons for wanting the office in a Dec. 27 a href=http://www.nytimes.com/2008/12/28/nyregion/28kennedytranscript.html?scp=5amp;sq=Caroline%20Kennedy%20amp;st=cseinterview /athat reads like a verbal tug of war. The Times reporters wanted tried to get Kennedy to say how she'd improve on Sen. Clinton's performance in the Senate -- Kennedy refused. They tried to get her to say why she'd be a better Senator than other potental appointees -- especially New York's Attorney General, a href=http://www.oag.state.ny.us/Andrew Cuomo/a. (And of course, all mentions of Cuomo must be accompanied by the reminder that he is the son of former Gov. Mario Cuomo and the ex-husband of Caroline Kennedy's cousin) Her response:/p blockquotepAndrew Cuomo is someone I’ve known for many, many years and we’vebr / talked, you know, throughout this process, so, you know, we have abr / really good relationship and I admire the work he’s doing now and whatbr / he’s done, so I’m not really going to kind of criticize any of thesebr / other candidates    /p /blockquote p It went on, like that, resulting in an a href=http://www.nytimes.com/2008/12/28/nyregion/28kennedy.html?scp=8amp;sq=Caroline%20Kennedy%20amp;st=csearticle/a in which the Times' reporters said Kennedy/p blockquotepquot;seemed less like a candidate than an idea of one: forceful but vague, largely undefined and seemingly determined to remain that way.quot;/p /blockquote pAt one point, Kennedy grew tired of being asked to detail her conversations with her family as wshe decided that she wanted the Senate seat and a href=http://www.nytimes.com/2008/12/28/nyregion/28kennedytranscript.html?pagewanted=6amp;sq=Caroline%20Kennedy%20amp;st=cseamp;scp=5said/a:/p blockquotep  Have you guys ever thought about writing for, like, a woman’s magazine or something? (Laughter) /p /blockquote p I found myself wondering as I read, quot;Is this really what New York voters want or need to know? Wouldn't they rather have some indication of what Kennedy would do as a Senator? What would have happened, I wondered, if the Times' reporters had been more focused on that? /p pFor example, Kennedy  cited her experience as a fund-raiser for the New York City schools as a qualification for the Senate, but refused to express an opinion about substituing merit pay for tenure as a perk for teachers is a good idea. She said there were a number of good experiments. I wanted a follow-up -- what experiments? What criteria would she use to judge their outcomes?.  /p pAlternatively, reporters might look through the seven books Kennedy co-authored or co-edited for hints. For example, in her a href=http://books.google.com/books?id=hihCJNrGNEACamp;printsec=frontcoveramp;dq=%22Caroline+Kennedy%22#PPA5,M1introduction/a to the 2002 update to her father's acclaimed essay collection, iProfiles in Courage/i, Kennedy commended a jurist who ruled against a colleagues' quot;defiantly unconstitutional display of the Ten Commandments in the courtroom.quot; Another book, a href=http://books.google.com/books?id=dunVAAAACAAJamp;dq=%22Caroline+Kennedy%22The Right to Privacy,/a which she co-authored with Ellen Alderman, might be the starting point for interview questions about FISA, abortion, and other contentious issues.  /p pOne other item from that interview -- Kennedy's refusal to answer questions about her finances -- seems poised to turn into a larger political issue. This weekend, the New York Times a href=http://www.nytimes.com/2009/01/04/nyregion/04disclose.html?ref=nyregionreported /athat  because of an apparent loophole, Kennedy failed to fill out disclosure forms that would normally be required of someone holding her positions within the state Department of Education. The Times is right to demand answers on this one. /p pMeanwhile, Kennedy's been criticized for her performance in the Times'br / interview. Mark Tran, who writes for the UK Guardian, compared Kennedybr / to Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin:/p blockquotepShe may belong to one of America's fabled political dynasties, butbr / Caroline Kennedy has crashed on take-off in a series of interviews tobr / prepare for a possible political career./p /blockquote pFausta a href=http://faustasblog.com/?p=8547argues/a the comparison is an insult to Palin:/p blockquotepLet’s take a look at that: /p ul liFirst woman lected governor of Alaska,br / who beat one of his own party: Palin: check, check. Caroline… no./li liPalin oversees $2.9 billion state budget. Caroline raised $65 million for the city’s public schools./li liChaired the Alaska Oil and Gas Conservation Commission: Palin.br / Caroline was director of the Office of Strategic Partnerships for thebr / the New York City Department of Education./li liElected mayor for two terms: Palin: check. Caroline… no elected office./li /ul /blockquote p Jennifer's a href=http://injennifershead.com/?p=384similarly unimpressed/a by Kennedy's media performance -- including her fondness for, um, like, fillers, you know? /p p /ppSo Caroline Kennedy thinks she is the a href=http://edition.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/12/29/kennedy.senate/most qualified/a person to fill Hillary Clinton’s Senate seat.  She puts it so eloquently/p blockquotepI’m really coming into this as somebody who isn’t, youbr / know, part of the system, who obviously, you know, stands for thebr / values of, you know, the Democratic Party.  I know how important it isbr / to, you know, to be my own person. And, you know, and that would bebr / obviously true with my relationship with the mayor./p /blockquote p /pp The headmistress at The Common Room a href=http://heartkeepercommonroom.blogspot.com/2008/12/caroline-kennedy.htmlthinks/a the New York Times was nicer to Kennedy than Charlie Gibson was to Palin. /p pGloria Feldt a href=http://www.gloriafeldt.com/heartfeldt-politics-blog/2008/12/26/an-inconvenient-debate-caroline-kennedy-and-the-american-dre.htmlponders /awhat the competing narratives about Kennedy tell us about the American Dream, especially for women:/p pI'd rather tell the American dream narrative that any girl can grow upbr / to be a senator--you don't have to be quot;royaltyquot; to have a chance. /p pHere are more opinions on Kennedy's suitability for the Senate:/p pJulie form Momocrats a href=http://momocrats.typepad.com/momocrats/2008/12/why-i-back-caro.htmlthinks/a Kennedy would be a great Senator because, /p pShe's bright, well-educated, connected, involved, inspired by Obama,br / strong on education (she has worked for the last five years for Newbr / York public schools), knowledgeable and dedicated to charitable works,br / and is, I believe, at the exact point in life where experience andbr / wisdom meet to make her an excellent candidate. /p pAnali's a href=http://analisfirstamendment.blogspot.com/2008/12/caroline-kennedys-qualifications-poll.htmlalso a fan./a/p p Anne Doyle a href=http://www.annedoylestrategies.com/OnAnnesMind/Entry.aspx?ContentItemID=1110amp;EmailID=04129532326thinks/a that Kennedy's credentials are being cast in a lesser light because they are in areas traditionally seen as women's work -- raising money for charities, for example./p pDo you think the news media is giving Caroline Kennedy a fair hearing? What questions would you like to ask her, or any of the other rumored candidates for Hillary Clinton's seat? /p

pDon't throw your pearls before swine./p pI remember my late Irish grandmother saying that to me when I was an awkward tomboy, brimming with energy and a palpable yearning to be accepted and liked by other children. And I used to giggle at her and feel just a little embarrassed, even though I didn't know exactly what the expression meant./p pBut I know what it means now./p pAnd I realized just what a great piece of advice it was last week while watching Graham in the play area of a href=http://donmillsdiva.blogspot.com/2008/12/how-i-learned-to-stop-worrying-and.htmluthe restaurant-which-shall-not-be-named-but-which-I-have-nonetheless-learned-to-love-without-shame./u/a/p pYes, my son is only three years old. And no, there were no actual swine involved. There was only a perfectly normal and wonderfully boisterous group of eight or nine-year-old boys who were charging up and down the play structure, shouting and hooting and electrifying the air with their rambunctious energy./p pAnd then there was Graham./p pGraham spent the better part of an hour trailing the lot of them like a puppy dog in search of scraps. He stood at their edges, clapping his hands in excitement when they shouted and made vain attempt after vain attempt to join in their games of tag, only to be left in their figurative dust time and time again./p pMy heart ached to intervene, to distract him or implore the older boys to include him, but I didn't. I merely sipped my coffee and observed. Not only did the boys' rejection do nothing to dissuade him, Graham was so intent on trying to join the crowd that he actually failed to notice the overtures of a smaller, quieter boy who approached him and tried to interest him in a slide designed for children closer to their age./p pAs I watched I couldn't help but remember my grandmother's advice and I soon realized that the aching feeling in my heart was as much regret as it was sadness for Graham./p pCheck out the rest at:/p pa href=http://www.donmillsdiva.blogspot.com/www.donmillsdiva.blogspot.com/a/p p#160;/p

pFrom Sarah Palin to Tina Fey -The Betty Editors, a href=http://www.bettyconfidential.com/BettyConfidential.com/a /ppimg src=http://www.bettyconfidential.com/images/a1/artimg03830.jpg alt=Sarah Palin width=300 height=300 //p pstrong1. Sarah Palin/strongbr /Pit bull with lipstick, governor grandma, love her or hate her, you have to admit - Sarah Palin captured everyone's attention this year. Her acceptance speech and her debate performance was watched by millions and millions. Even those who didn't want her a heartbeat from the President conceded she was a babe with great political skills. And, you betcha, we have not heard the last of her./p pimg src=http://www.bettyconfidential.com/images/a1/artimg03823.jpg alt=Michelle Obama width=300 height=300 //p pstrong2. Michelle Obama/strongbr /An American Dream girl. She's been labeled everything from emover-bearing/em to ema throw-back /em(putting her career on hold to support her husband on the campaign trail and care for her daughters). She'll of course be our first ever African American first lady, and she certainly seems to have the strength and grace to withstand the scrutiny that will be trained on her and her family for at least the next four years. For now - we can't wait to see what she wears to the Inauguration!/p pimg src=http://www.bettyconfidential.com/images/a1/artimg03821.jpg alt=Hillary Clinton width=300 height=300 //p pstrong3. Hillary Clinton/strongbr /She may never be Madame President (... but Madame Secretary of State is nothing to sneeze at). Even her detractors have to admit - the brilliant Hillary Clinton is a study in never-give-up, a lesson in dogged determination. We've known her since her first year as our super-smart yet somehow awkward first lady - she sure broke the mold. She famously stood by her man, yet put those 13 million cracks in the glass ceiling. We've seen her tackle universal health care (and fail), go though more hairstyles and pantsuits than Career Barbie, cry on camera, and now, be appointed to the Cabinet of the man she tried to beat to the Presidency./p pimg src=http://www.bettyconfidential.com/images/a1/artimg03822.jpg alt=Meredith Whitney width=300 height=300 //p pstrong4. Meredith Whitney/strongbr /First they called her a quot;money honeyquot; (one of the pretty young things trotted out to make financial news watchable) - now they call her the quot;Dollar Dominatrix.quot; Whatever her nickname, this financial super-star is best known as the woman who called the economic crash in October of 2007. Too bad no one seemed to listen - at the time. A managing director at Wall Street bank The Oppenheimer (OPY), the beautiful, ballsy blond is - incongruously - married to professional wrestler John Layfield. Layfield's WWF cred came in handy when she needed him to escort her to and from her office - telling the cold hard truth on Wall Street doesn't exactly make you Miss Popularity. Whitney has become such a sought-after speaker that she now has an agent, and it's said that a word from her can wipe out millions of dollars in share values. Who says girls aren't good at math?/p pimg src=http://www.bettyconfidential.com/images/a1/artimg03829.jpg alt=Stephanie Meyer width=300 height=300 //p pstrong5. Stephenie Meyer/strongbr /From observant Mormon housewife to Vampire-literary sensation ... does it get any more interesting that that? She doesn't drink or smoke or watch R-rated movies. She wrote the first book (the idea of which came to her in a dream) in three months while caring for three kids under age 5. People of all ages dress up as her characters, her book-signings are mobbed, and the fansite Twilight Moms has hundreds of thousdands of members. We can't wait to see what she dreams up next./p pimg src=http://www.bettyconfidential.com/images/a1/artimg03828.jpg alt=Tyra Banks width=300 height=300 //p pstrong6. Tyra Banks/strongbr /Surely the most beautiful entertainment mogul ever. Another teetotaler, Tyra somehow has her perfectly manicured fingers firmly on the pop-culture pulse of the nation. The model-actress-singer-businesswoman shows no sighs of stopping and we can't take out eyes off her whether she wears size 2 or size 12./p pimg src=http://www.bettyconfidential.com/images/a1/artimg03824.jpg alt= width=300 height=300 //p pstrong7. Nastia Liukin/strongbr /You know who she is! That adorable gymnast who looks more like a ballerina - tall, graceful and sweet as apple pie. Liukin, who brought five Olympic medals home from Beijing, was just named Sportswoman of the Year by the Women's Sports Foundation. Of course - gymnastics runs in the family. Born in Russia to two professional gymnasts, Liukin's family immigrated to the US when she was 2 - making her yet another American dream success story. She plans to perform in the world championships in London. After that - who knows? She's expressed interest in becoming an actress ... and she has a Visa commercial and plenty of TV appearances under her belt already./p pimg src=http://www.bettyconfidential.com/images/a1/artimg03825.jpg alt=Rachel Maddow width=300 height=300 //p pstrong8. Rachel Maddow/strongbr /There's something about Rachel Maddow that makes her so watchable. Sure she's brilliant and well-spoken - not to mention the first openly gay anchor to host a prime time news show - but there's more to it. Perhaps it's the unique combination of those beautiful Judy Garland eyes, her rapier wit, and the fact that she dresses like a 10-year-old boy off the set. She defies categorization./p pimg src=http://www.bettyconfidential.com/images/a1/artimg03820.jpg alt=Britney Spears width=300 height=300 //p pstrong9. Britney Spears/strongbr /emTrain wreck, pop princess, has-been, next big thing ... again/em. Britney called 2008 her quot;crazy yearquot; in a recent interview ... ain't that the truth. No matter what she does, we can't help rooting for her. And no matter how crazy she gets, we'll never get tired of watching her./p pimg src=http://www.bettyconfidential.com/images/a1/artimg03827.jpg alt=Tina Fey width=300 height=300 //p pstrong10. Tina Fey/strongbr /Does Tina Fey owe much of her recent superstardom to her doppleganger Sarah Palin? Perhaps. No matter what the cause, 2008 was the year that took Tina Fey into the comedic stratosphere. With her sexy librarian glasses and come-hither cleavage, Fey makes funny as well as all - and better than most - of the funny boys. Brains, beauty, and a keen eye for political satire. Now that's something to laugh about./p pa href=http://www.bettyconfidential.com/ar/h/a/a03567.htmlhttp://www.bettyconfidential.com/ar/h/a/a03567.html/a/p

pWhen I decided I wanted to start writing about my passions, sports and video games, I knew that there are going to be people out there who obviously know more about the categories than I do. But something that troubles me is when I post a video game article on quot;video game sitesquot;, I get completely torn apart by all the males that seem to know everything there is to know about the industry. Insults about my gender quickly follow any post which always seem to include the line quot;go make me a sandwichquot;. These statements no doubt anger me to the point I want to shove that sandwich they speak of somewhere that is not appropriate to state. A sense of anger would overwhelm me when I would read comments about my posts./p pAfter numerous hateful comments, I started googling the behavior towards women in the video game industry and found out I was not alone. Though not everyone is an ignorant chauvinist, cruel comments and quot;ganging upquot; on females during online video game play is quite rampant. I have recently become a strong supporter of women's future in the gaming industry when I ran across a video about the original women in gaming. To be honest, I had no idea that women have played key roles in many classic games since the 80's. Women like Donna Bailey (programmer of Centipede) and Carol Shaw (first video game designer) that are talked about in the video seemed to comfort me. I thought about how much these women have been influences and broke into a completely male dominated industry and paved the way for women to have a future. Though the gaming industry is very slow to adapt, more and more of Corporate America is opening their doors to women./p pThankfully Web 2.0 has come along and open the door to social communities where girls can gather and not feel so hated and alone in the video game world. Sites like GrrlGamer.com, GamerVixens.com (still in beta) and WomenGamers.com are all sites that create a welcoming atmosphere. I look forward to the day of posting a blog article to a quot;hardcore gamerquot; site and having a legitimate debate with someone about the topic without being terrified to check the comments./p pWhen I feel frustrated about the way other women are treated, I watch this video and it makes me hold my head up and be proud for writing about what I love and what women have done for the industry that I love so much./p pa href=http://onnetworks.com/videos/play-value/women-in-gaming target=_blank title=Women in Gaming Videohttp://onnetworks.com/videos/play-value/women-in-gaming/a /p

pI have no problems with homosexuality or lesbianism. I would not treat a homosexual/lesbian any differently. They should be treated equally in terms of work opportunities etc./p pWhether one becomes homosexual through nurturing or if it's in their genes... I really can't say. It's debatable - Is there a gay gene? (is it rainbow coloured?) /p pWhat I despise though are Faux Fags! I say faux fags because I mean those people who aren't really homosexuals or lesbians but pretend to be that way because they think it makes them look good... or special.. or more interesting than they could ever be if they were just straight. Some call if pseudo-homosexuality or faux lesbianism./p pstrongIs it just a trend? Is it hip to be gay?/strong/p pOf course it is! Being gay is a huge trend now! Especially amongst teens and young adults./p pIn Singapore... why is it we see so many teenage same sex couples, but not as many mature same sex couples? (by mature I mean about 30 years and older)/p pPerhaps because teens are more susceptible to following a trend????? Or do you really believe we quot;out-growquot; gayness as we get older? I call bullshit on that. I think a lot of gay teens aren't really gay in the first place./p pThe media keeps on hyping up gayness. Do you remember the Russian pop duo t.A.T.u. ? Their song quot;All the Things She Saidquot; became a hit because the girls claimed that they were a lesbian couple. Later, it came out that the ladies were in fact, NOT GAY. That was just part of their marketing gimmick, but the mere suggestion was enough to make the song a hit./p pEven more recently, we have Madonna and Christina and Britney kissing each other on stage to up the sizzle factor./p pFollowing very closely, Lindsey Lohan and Samantha Ronson relations have filled the pages of many celebrity gossip magazines. My... my... what a strange coincidence eh? (maybe it's airborne this gay gene *I am rolling my eyes*)br /---------/p pWhen I was younger, when my straight girlfriend and I were at a club, we realised that men will come pouring over us when we started dirty dancing with each other as if we were sexually intimate/interested in each other. Ok.. I may be totally wrong, but we thought we looked hot together. (haha.. if the joke's on me)/p pAll that lesbian show-off type dancing was a good fun while I was a teenager, but was I really innately or subconsciously lesbian???strongNo./strong It was all pretend. In reality, the sheer thought of going down on another woman makes my stomach turn. /ppNow then... Is it a far cry for me to say that a lot of strongstraight girls/strong out there have also realised the appeal of lesbianism to men? And are for a fact not really lesbains???/p pstrongWhat are your views? Do leave them in the comment section or on my blog a href=http://www.holly--jean.blogspot.com/www.holly--jean.blogspot.com/a. (There's also a poll there on this topic)/strong/p

pShe had her coat on with the furry hood and her oldest worn boots. She stepped out and realized she forgot to put her leggings on under her jeans as the cold attacked her legs. She ran down the street to the store to get exactly what she needed: butternut squash, onions, peppers and crackers. She already had the cheese and chocolate. At the checkout she looked at the girl behind the counter and saw how sad she looked. Miserable, in fact, with tears in her eyes. And she immiediately went back to the time when she was waiting tables, aching to get out- to move into a better home, better career, better life. She wondered what this girl was crying about. She imagined it had something to do with being tired, having too many compromises run her life, not enough money to pay her bills. Or worst of all, the paralysis of credit card debt that puts a stronger lock on the prison she's in. She felt herself well up with tears just thinking about her own life a few years before. As she walked back out into the cold she let the tears freeze on her face until she got to her front door, and then stood inside and let them melt knowing that she had been that girl and now was more the woman she had always intended to become. She stepped out of her boots, placed them next to the trash and went inside./p

pIt's fun fact friday and since I can't think of a fun fact to share about myself today I'm going to tell you a fun fact about the human body:/p pBabies are born with 300 bones. However, by adulthood we only have 206 bones in our body./p pReason? As babies grow some of their bones fuse together forming one bone out of many./p pNow... speaking of babies. Some of you noticed Mistletoe's quot;9 more monthsquot; comment on my last blog and have been wondering if I'm pregnant......................................./p pa href=http://www.jennifersuarez.com/Journal/index.cfm?currentMonth=1amp;currentYear=2009#599uRead the rest of this entry on www.JenniferSuarez.com/u/a/p

pnbsp;/p p    Happy New year to All !/p p                 I have a sincere question about gender equality that hopefully ladies of all ages will answer .  First of all , I would like to state that I believe men and women are completely equal yet utterly different . To me equalty does not mean sameness  . Everything about us is different however we are completely equal . /p p                The last 20 years have seen significant advancement and prominence in once exclusively male domains : politics , finance , executive business positions , chefs , even poker !  I am aware that although there is greater access to opportunity for women in all formerly male dominated positions , equal pay is still not on the table . The question I have is : do women who work in once male dominated postions feel that they are free to do their work as women or is there is subtle or not so subtle expectation that you will do it the same as a man would ? /p p               Can we engage in a dialogue on this ? /p pnbsp;/p

pMy dear sweet sister Mary died on December 10th. After our mother died in 2001, Mary was the closest thing I had to a mother. I am the youngest of nine children, and, although I still have several living siblings, this loss - especially so close to the holidays - has been very hard to bear. I remember Mary as a fiercely independent woman who loved to live, travel, have adventures, and had a marvelously demented sense of humor. Her decline and death has left a hole in my heart, and it will take a long time for that to heal. I would like to share with you the words of remembrance that I wrote the night Mary passed away. May you all have someone like Mary in your life: /p pMy eyes are bone-dry. I've cried out all the tears I can today. My eyesbr / actually ache and burn. And there's this tumor of discontent - uneasy,br / nausea-inducing discontent - roiling in my gut./p pDid I spend enough time talking to her? Telling her I loved her?/p pWas there more I could have done to make her last years more enjoyable?/p pShould I have stopped being a coward about back pain and made sure I drove up to New Jersey more often to see her?/p pThe first year I lived in Maryland, I drove up to New Jersey as often as I could. I had a 1989 Ford Escort station wagon with no air conditioning, and I drove up and down I-95 with my left arm dangling out the window the whole way. I did this enough times that year to actually permanently cook my left arm into a darker pigment than the right arm. It's very attractive. But, honestly, it was worth it. I had a community of family there. And then, when she was still vibrant and able, Mary was at the center of it./p pMary was fun. She took me on my first motorcycle ride (right before she had a horrific accident - that was when I was a little kid.) She had a Triumph Spitfire sports car, and I believe she left the transmission (or the engine itself) somewhere on a New Jersey highway shortly after purchasing it. At one point, she headed west and lived in a valley outside of L.A. for a while. She drank Tab obsessively and smoked (much to everyone's dismay) Benson amp; Hedges menthols by the carton./p pMary came to visit me when I lived in Russia. She came over with our sister Barb, and we had a blast. Of course, that was in 1990, and some Central Asian guys on Red Square thought my sisters - with their Jersey uniforms of floral leggings and bright t-shirts - were hookers. I laughed my ass off. Looking for souvenirs in Izmailovsky Park, Mary chose the most bizarre and unlikely thing possible - a real dead squirrel, stuffed, posed, and glued onto a tree branch. Some sort of snap binder clip had been inserted into its paws, and it clutched a pack of cigarettes and stared with wild glass eyes. She carried it home in this awful Pepto pink box. I have no idea how the hell she got it through U.S. Customs./p pSeveral years ago, while vacuuming, Mary bumped the shelf where she displayed her Muscovite squirrel. All the fur fell off in one fell swoop./p pNaked dead varmint? Not so cute. Citizen Squirrel was finally given the Hefty bag salute and removed from the premises./p pAfter Mom died, Mary had the unenviable task of handling the estate. There wasn't much to the estate. Mom had nine kids. We were like a constant plague of locusts. But it was a mess nonetheless. That was back in 2001. Springtime./p pIn the wake of 9/11, when the airlines were desperate to get passengers back in the air, United had a frequent flyer mileage reward sale. From my old days of flying back and forth between DC and Uzbekistan/Kazakhstan/YouNameAStan, I had a pile of miles. With the sale, I had enough to buy tickets for myself and Mary to Thailand./p pI have great affection for Thailand, and I thought my sister would really dig it. She did. I booked a fabulous hotel in Phuket (a hotel that later would be swept away in the devastating 2004 tsunami) for $28 a night. We ate and slept like royalty and shopped like there was no tomorrow. I have incredibly fond memories of that trip, despite my sister permanently burning the tops of her feet because of her refusal to apply sunscreen to them on a very sunny beach, and despite my mugging at knifepoint in a Bangkok market. I remember coming back to the hotel from the market, after dealing with the police, $800 lighter in my pocket (I was buying textiles.) I'd made my sister see the hotel doctor about her feet while I was strikeshopping/strike being mugged./p pI staggered back into the room, wallet empty, shopping bags unused, and my sister asked, quot;What the hell happened?!?quot;/p pI shrugged. quot;I got mugged. Lost everything I had.quot;/p pMy sister responded. quot;Jesus Christ, what should we do?quot;/p pMy answer, quot;Fuck it. Let's order room service.quot;/p pAnd we did. And we laughed. And I have this awesome photo of my sister, hepped up on pain killers for her feet, holding the vented lid to her room service plate over her face like some twisted carnival mask. It's in my office at work. I put it on the shelf across from my desk so I can see her goofy, plated face every day when I sit down./p pMary would travel with me to the Yucatan Peninsula, too, back in 2003 or 2004. I can't quite remember the year tonight. Forgive me for my lapses - I'm not firing on all cylinders. That year, I was going to travel alone to the Mexican coastal town of Tulum (a relatively short drive from Chichen Itza) for my birthday. However, I suffered a little mishap two days before I was supposed to fly.../p pI was scheduled for a colonoscopy. My mom had colon cancer, so I thought it was wise to start early with preventative checks./p pI did the miserable two days of prep for the procedure, finishing up with that wretched morning-of-the-camera-up-the-rump fiesta that leaves you running for the bathroom and wishing for sweet death. As I waited for the tummy rumblings, I laced my hiking boots in preparation of packing them up for the Mexico trip. When nature not only called, but screamed my name, I bolted from the sofa, knocking one boot off onto the floor./p pAnd I tripped over that frigging boot./p pAnd broke cleanly in half the big joint that holds the big left toe to the angry left foot./p pI spent my birthday that year hopping around in a big fuzzy black bootie./p pBut through the wonders of travel insurance, I was able to reschedule for Christmas, and Mary wanted to come along. We met up in Newark, ready for a Christmas week of sun, surf, and Mayan ruins./p pWell, we got the Mayan ruins./p pBut we also got a freak weather front that brought temperatures in the 60s, rather than the 80s and 90s, and with it, a plague of small black flies. I still went snorkeling (for five or six minutes at a time before I would come out of the water shivering and blue) and my sister still enjoyed the beach. It's just that I started to appreciate my sister as a smoker; her menthols kept the damn flies away./p pFlies or no flies, we had a blast./p pBut it was on that trip that I noticed my sister was faltering. She took spills, including one spectacular fall on a tile floor that made my stomach lurch and fear that our trip was over./p pIt turned out, my sister had MS./p pAmazingly, she self-diagnosed her MS, watching some home shopping channel charity event. Every symptom they described, she had. She went to her doctor, they scheduled some brain scans and discovered fast-moving lesions. Not a good sign. And Mary's health was already compromised: diabetes, smoking, and constant pain from injuries she sustained in a horrific car accident wherein she was struck from behind at stop light by a moron reading architectural plans as he sped down the street on a military facility. Mary had been a volunteer EMT, and some of the guys who responded to her accident knew her. They thought she was dead. But Mary was tenacious. She survived. But she had to have knee replacement surgery, and things were never the same for her./p pWe thought we were going to lose her a couple of years ago, when she became horribly sick and spent weeks and weeks in the hospital. I kept trying to mentally prepare myself, but that's almost a joke. No matter how well prepared you think you are, you never really are. She struggled back from that illness, but she was fading./p pThis year, she spent months in the hospital, and every single time I spoke to her, all she wanted was to go back home. I think she knew her time was very limited./p pAnd now she is gone. Like my mother. Like my brother Ed. I was going to a doctor's appointment en route to work today when I got the call. And I cried. And I cried. And I cried. Between meetings today, I would stop and cry. When people were nice to me, I had to then go shut my door and cry. I've had a mule-kick headache since noon./p pNothing seems quite right today. Music on the radio. Laughter in the hallway. Stopping at the pharmacy to pick something up. It feels wrong to be doing anything quot;normalquot; - whatever that really means. I feel like I should have just curled up on the sofa and slept. But that's not right, either./p pLife does continue, whether we feel it's rhythm acutely or muffled through grief. Life continues. And those of us still here have to tell the stories of those who are not./p pMy sister is no longer here. But I am./p pWhat is that line from quot;Shawshank Redemptionquot;?/p pquot;Get busy living, or get busy dying.quot;/p pI guess I better get busy living. For you, Mary, I will get busy living./p pBe at peace, Mary. No more pain. No more limitations./p pBe at peace./p pemMary Colleen LaMannabr /July 21, 1946 - December 10, 2008/em/p pnbsp;/p

pAre you feeling a bit blue ladies because you don't have a man for New Year's Eve?  Well Don't!  It's all good, cuz Sexxy hates England and ain't havin it no more!!!  How bout them apples!  /p pIt doesn't matter ladies...move on cuz we are higher beings on this planet than that....BELIEVE IT....I have seen where we can go and as long as you know who you are underneath it all....you're becoming a better woman!!!   /p pI mean...it may take a few more lessons but you will get to the promised land ladies.  I'm positive about it and I know it's coming soon.  /p pCheers to the most ultimate reason to start 2009 shining brightly...come on ladies let's step out into this vast universe and change things in our favor!  /p pHappy New Years Ladies...embrace your challenges and get stronger!  This lifetime has no expiration date; so make the most of it and get there!!! We all know life throws us curve balls from time to time.  But if we hang on; uwe see we don't die....we get stronger/u! /p pOh, and don't think cuz u know me, that this same thing ain't happenin elsewhere....it exists here in the midwest, but it's like wide spread like a damn epidemic.  It's here, in fuckin big/small town USA St. Louis, Missouri...where the question asked of you when you meet someone is quot;What high school you went to?quot; Yes it is..but Ummm, YEA, it exists EVERYWHERE.  /p pSo this is my salute to women all over our planet.  We're not in it alone ladies...look to your left and to your right, it runs rampid in ALL society today.  /p pSo any ladies that are strongnewly single/strong or strongchoosingly single/strong or strongunexpectedly single/strong or strongneed to be single/strong but strongcan't be single/strong in France, Italy, Sweden, Columbia, the Phillipeans, all you georgeous, incredibly talented, absolute fabulousity strongfrom top to bottom/strong, gleaming strongfrom fingertip to fingertip/strong, stronger than you realize sistas of mine on this planet....strongrejoice in this day/strong!!!!/p pAnd be honest with yourself....he wudn't EVEN it, was he????  Come on and admit it...your better off...to the left with that shit...I'm not having it....we ain't buyin it...sell that shit around the corner!!!  I'm sooooo good!  /p pThank You Lord!!!  Don't forget ladies...forgive but don't forget!  These lessons trully define our character and the mark we leave on this time in history!  It's ours to define!/p

pstrongI am really bothered by something that has continued to be a running theme in a lot of churches headed by Black Pastors. There appears to be this envy, jealousy, hatred...whatever you want to call it...against President-Elect Obama. Once again, I had to go to church and listen to President-elect Obama be wrongly criticized. Basically, I feel that a lot of Black male preachers are simply jealous of President-elect Obama's place in the hearts and minds of Black women./strongstrongStay with me for a second and I will explain.../strongstrongSince the twilight years of the Civil Rights movement (which followed the years after Dr. King's death), Black preachers have had Black women under their control. Without question, we blindly followed these dastardly preachers as they presided over the social, political, spiritual, and educational demise of the Black race (to name a few)./strongstrongRead the rest at:/strongstronga href=http://agapeloveempowermentministry.blogspot.com/http://agapeloveempowermentministry.blogspot.com/a/strong/p

pimg src=http://www.thecocktailcafe.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/wedding-rings.jpg alt= What kind of wife are you? width=385 height=185 align=left //p pnbsp;/p pIs it just me or was 2008 the year of the wife? The heat is off the desperatebr / housewives and all eyes are on that thing that you thought had gone west withbr / our mothers’ generation: the art of being a good wife. /p pIn the space of a few months, the spotlight has shifted from women asbr / mothers, women juggling careers and families, and women who drink too much, tobr / women in their role as wives. This is about a new interest in how females keepbr / their men happy./p pFor those of us who are using the credit crunch as an excuse not to have ourbr / legs waxed and cook only pasta and bottled pesto, there is something called thebr / “strongaverage and we’re fine, thanks/strong” wife./p pnbsp;/p pThe categories of wife that emerged thisbr / year:/p h31.) THE GODDESS WIFE/h3 pLast year’s frumpy mummy has morphed into this year’s Goddess wife. Shebr / indulges her man with luxurious puddings and sugary cocktails (strongHellobr / Mama!… so you already know which one I am right/strong?), and she doesn’t wearbr / mom jeans either. strongHomemaking is her forte, but always packaged asbr / foreplay/strong. Her priority is strongmaking her husband feel verybr / special/strong and, just on the side, as it were, she happens to be strongabr / fabulously successful businesswoman with a razor-sharp mind/strong./p h32.) THE POSH/h3 pThis wife recognizes her responsibility to look good, spendbr / money and generally showcase her man’s wealth and virility, but also knows thatbr / she is now required to bring something extra to the party. In the past, a careerbr / might have clashed with the job of ego maintenance, but first strongVictoriabr / Beckham/strong and now strongJada-Pinkett Smith /stronghave all provedbr / that the strongsporting trophy wife with projects of her own is a superiorbr / asset/strong. Now the Posh Mom with wit and commercial savvy gets morebr / attention and makes her man look modern. /p h33.) THE PROJECT MANAGER (PM) WIFE/h3 pstrongHillary Clinton/strong is a PM wife. These wives are at least asbr / ambitious as their husbands, but they are pragmatic and focused on the package —br / in other words, if they know they can get where they want to be faster as abr / team, stronga PM wife will sideline her career to get behind her man/strong.br / PM wives look as if they have given up a lot, but never forget, strongtheirbr / husbands are their No 1 investment/strong and, as often as not, the wives arebr / forcing the pace. The new generation of politicians, bankers and big businessmenbr / often have PM wives (as opposed to Vocational wives, see below), becausebr / strongthey are extremely capable and happy to be left running their ownbr / empires/strong. They are the least surrendered behind the scenes, though theybr / give the outward appearance of always putting themselves second./p h34.) THE VOCATIONAL WIFE/h3 pShe is blissfully content pottering around in her own fragrant, pastel-tintedbr / world, leaving her man to do all the hunter-gatherer stuff, and she freelybr / admits that if she didn’t assume this traditional role, strongtheir marriagebr / would never survive/strong. The vocational wife strongoozes maternalbr / instinct and tends not to differentiate much between her kids and herbr / husband/strong, but note, strongthis is her choice/strong, and, like thebr / PM wife, she has her own power and sphere of influence./p h35.) THE INSPIRATIONAL WIFE/h3 pstronga href=http://www.thecocktailcafe.com/mom-knows-style/michelle-obama-fashion-we-can-afford/ target=_blank title=Michelle Obama shops at Hamp;M, JCrew, and Gap storesMichelle Obama/a/strong is the no-contest Inspirational wifebr / of the moment, having reinvented the role of supportive political spouse. Nobr / more smiling in the background, wearing navy and a hairspray helmet.br / strongMrs. O’s MO is “keeping it real”,/strong keeping it equal and keepingbr / it modern. She is the first first-lady (elect) to dress in a href=http://www.gap.com/ target=_blank title=The Gap Store Official Website where Michelle Obama shopsGapimg id=snap_com_shot_link_icon class=snap_preview_icon src=http://i.ixnp.com/images/v3.61.1/t.gif alt= //a, a href=http://www.hm.com/ target=_blank title=Hamp;M Official Website where Michelle Obama ShopsHamp;Mimg id=snap_com_shot_link_icon class=snap_preview_icon src=http://i.ixnp.com/images/v3.61.1/t.gif alt= //a, and a href=http://www.jcrew.com/ target=_blank title=J Crew official website where Michelle Obama shopsJ.Crewimg id=snap_com_shot_link_icon class=snap_preview_icon src=http://i.ixnp.com/images/v3.61.1/t.gif alt= //a, the first who wasbr / strongpreviously the primary breadwinner/strong, the first to talk about herbr / husband’s “stinky” presence in bed. The first to strongbehave, in short, likebr / a regular wife/strong (though with the appropriate extra injection of smarts,br / glamour and a little bit of style). She is inspirational, not because she isbr / married to the next president of the United States, but because strongshe isbr / determined to make the most visible wifely role in the world a reflection of thebr / lives most of us live/strong./p blockquote pstrongNo1 Inspirational wife: Michelle Obama/strongbr /strongTopbr / quote:/strong “People have notions of what a wife’s role should be in thisbr / process, and it has been a traditional one of blind adoration. My model isbr / different: I think most real marriages are.”/p /blockquote h36.) THE WORKING-AT-IT WIFE/h3 pIn the past, this woman might have had a walker, or maybe a toy-boy (or girlbr / if your into that) companion, but that was before wifeliness became abr / competitive sport. The WAI wife is an strongalpha woman who knows thatbr / marriage plus kids is necessary to make up the full life package/strong, andbr / she wants to get this one sorted and filed the way she has done every otherbr / lifestyle choice. Inevitably, strongher husband is a lesser noise than she isbr / and this can make life difficult/strong: the compromise issue, not to mentionbr / which continent to settle on, is a problem, hence the “working at it”.br / strongMadonna/strong was the classic WAI wife. She hated to compromise, butbr / she knew that you have to do a bit of it, along with some handholding andbr / whispered ego-boosting./p blockquote pstrongNo1 WAI wife: Madonna/strongbr /strongTop quote:/strong “A goodbr / marriage is a contest of generosity.”/p /blockquote h37.) THE AVERAGE AND “WE’RE FINE, THANKS” WIFE/h3 pstrongThis wife is anyone who identifies with the followingbr / statements:/strong/p liMy husband cooks as often as I do and probably better; /li liI have cancelled all waxing, plus the gym, as a credit-crunch precaution; /li liI have never given a speech on behalf of my husband, though I might havebr / heckled during one; /li liI always wear knickers and hardly ever ones you would be happy to be runbr / over in; /li liI would hang on his every word, but not if there isbr / something distracting on television; /li liI do not ask if he likes what I am wearing because of course he is not goingbr / to “get” harem pants; /li pnbsp;/p pSobr / Which Wife R U? Leave me a Comment on my Website at a href=http://www.thecocktailcafe.com title=http://www.thecocktailcafe.comhttp://www.thecocktailcafe.com/a/p pnbsp;/p

pShe woke up with a urinary tract infection. Burning pain as she peed, the feeling that her bladder was dropping out of her body, blood on the toilet paper. Yeast infection well in effect, with an itch that was dull yet perpetual. The two go hand in hand, she found out. Blurred senstion behind her eyes, feeling utterly exhausted. She still didn't want those pills. So she took out her books and began to read. Bladder infection signifies being angry, usually at someone close to you, quot;pissed-offquot; literally. Flush it out of the body with water, lemon juice and take a concentrated does of cranberry several times a day. Vitamins C and E to help curb the infection. Echinacea and oregano oil, alternating, several times throughout the day with a few doses of garlic as well. She bought all of it, sat on the couch with her soup- butternut squash with turmeric- and water and chamomile tea, and rewrote her life plan in one afternoon. The infection took a week to clear, and three weeks total to ensure it was gone. Her body felt alive and new within three days. At the end of three weeks she thought she was in the clear so she had a hot fudge sundae. A small one, but it caused an almost instant relapse. She conquered it the next day, wondering why it is so much easier to go the route of being lazy than to work to feel good./p

pOver the past 2-3 months my pants have slowly grown tighter. I step on the scale and I see my numbers go up. I am helpless when it comes to the holidays. It's the food. My god the delicious, wonderful, butter filled, sugar coated, fat saturated, food. I love it all. From the turkey on Thanksgiving to the shrimp on New Years Eve I am someone who always partakes in ALL of the holiday feasts. It's not only the food that gets me, it's also the drinks. I enjoy the dark stouts, egg nogs, and wonderful wines with little regard to the sea of calories packed in every glass. The rest of the year I have restraint. I can behave. I can eat good and work out. But during the holidays I am lost in a sea of food without care./p pWhen the holidays come I sit on my butt, bundled in a mountain of blankets on the couch, and I eat and I drink. It's always the same rationale too. quot;It's winter. I could use the extra weight to keep me warm. My bulky sweaters will help disguise the extra pounds and it's so cold that I'll never wear anything more revealing than a pair of jeans anyway. Besides my boobs look bigger when I put on some weight! Trust me I can use as much help as possible in THAT department. I'll be fine. No worries. quot;/p pOf course that works great when I'm mindlessly shoving a plate of christmas cookies in my face and following them with a large glass of spiked egg nog. But when I step on the scale .../p pa href=http://www.jennifersuarez.com/Journal/index.cfm?currentMonth=12amp;currentYear=2008#596uRead the rest of this blog on www.JenniferSuarez.com/u/a/p

pAt the end of December, iThe New York Times/i ran two articles two days in a row about flight attendants. In the first, Katherine Zoepf profiled young women from Arab countries who left home to become flight attendants for Etihad, an airline based in Abu Dhabi, United Arab Emirates (UAE). The next day, Ann Hood (who will be my writing workshop instructor next semester - very exciting!) penned an op-ed looking back fondly on her days as a TWA flight attendant and the pride that airlines had in serving customers well./p pThe Dec. 22 article a href=http://www.nytimes.com/2008/12/22/world/middleeast/22abudhabi.html?partner=permalinkamp;exprod=permalinkIn Booming Gulf, Some Arab Women Find Freedom in the Skies/a, 9th in a series about life in the Muslim world, generated debate in the a href=http://community.nytimes.com/article/comments/2008/12/22/world/middleeast/22abudhabi.html?s=1amp;pg=1comments section/a not only about cultural bias and what constitutes freedom, but also what the role of stewardess means historically. In the comments, people slammed the author for her American view of freedom, the lack of information about other job opportunities that are available to women in the Middle East, and other comments that supported the stewardesses as pioneers for freedom. /p pFor a great summary of bloggers' criticism of the article, check out Fatemeh's round up at a href=http://muslimahmediawatch.org/2008/12/23/fly-girls-the-nyts-essentialist-profile-of-emirati-flight-attendants/Muslimah Media Watch./a She notes that the article is, often eye-rollingly essentializing when discussing Arab women and society./p pa href=http://grapeshisha.blogspot.com/2008/12/jobs-for-arab-women-what-does-freedom.htmlGrapeshisha/a, a site about life in the UAE, diplomatically summed up the discussion:/p blockquotep ...while the article appears to be factually correct, there is no discussion of other professions that Arab women have used to further themselves in society. And to an outsider,or someone not in the know the assumption is that a the furthest that a woman can go from being a housewife is to become a stewardess! I'm sure that is not what is intended. Nevertheless, the premise still holds that some women have changed their life through using the skies and the freedom associated with being a stewardess - that versus an option of not traveling or seeing the world./p pAn interesting article that could have been furthered by providing some exact data as well as looking at the wider impact of girl power in the Middle East. /p/blockquote pDanielle at a href=Sticky Candy/a had mixed feelings about the message:/p blockquotep The article is about young, unmarried Arab women have now found a career that lets them see the world. Yes, good, but it seems as if these women fit the archaic {albeit American} view of what a being a flight attendant means./p pI get it. Being a flight attendant allows these Arab women to face new freedoms, but how much exactly? I can't claim that I understand any of this. I certainly don't. My view is very much an Americanized view of Women's Rights, but I can only imagine that these women who have decided to follow their ambitions and beliefs, have also alienated their families and their home countries. Is this a cost that Arab women are willing to take?/p pBeing flight attendants, these women seem to become pigeonholed in two different ways... /p/blockquote pThe Dec. 23rd article on flight attendants, a href=http://www.nytimes.com/2008/12/23/opinion/23hood.html?partner=permalinkamp;exprod=permalinkUp, Up and Go Away/a struck me as particularly interesting because of the pride Hood describes that went along with her job as a flight attendant at TWA, back when we passed out magazines, offered playing cards to bored passengers, refilled coffee cups and we had dignity — passengers and crews alike. We were together up there at 35,000 feet, and for those hours in the clouds and stars, all of our worries stayed on the ground below. Hood saw the job in the same way as the women who work on Etihad planes do today: a chance to interact with people and travel. /p pSome of the harshest criticism directed at the article about careers as flight attendants for Arab women is that the jobs are serivle, and thus sexist. In addition, the old Fly Me ad was cited to show that flight attendants are all hired because they are young and pretty. While there is no doubt that some of this is true, a lot of it is as out of date as the ad is. a href=http://www.wyndhamworldwide.com/women_on_their_way/jane-air/archives/jane-ponders-sky-girls.htmlMusings from Jane Air/a has an interesting history of the field of cabin attendants, and reports that men make up about 20% of the flight attendant workforce today. Dress codes, weight restrictions, and other requirements that led to job offers only for the young and beautiful in the early days are in many cases in violation of anti-discrimination laws today, and thus no longer have as much impact on who gets hired. (Not that the industry is without problems regarding age discrimination, it's just not as bad today as it was years ago.) Etihad seems to be caught somewhere between the 1950s and current times in their policies./p pBlogs by flight attendants, like a href=http://www.theflyingpinto.com/The Flying Pinto/a and a href=http://www.shouldbewriting.blogspot.com/Another Flight Attendant Writing About Flying (and Other Stuff)/a, capture the occupational hazards and rewards of working in the airline industry. It's a hard job, and like many jobs that predominately are performed by women, the wages are low. Today's working conditions are more stressful than ever. Still, whether a woman is American or Egyptian or Brazilian, working a flight crew may provide opportunities to see the world that few other people have, and that chance is something to be prized./p piSuzanne also blogs at a href=http://cussandotherrants.comCampaign for Unshaved Snatch (CUSS) amp; Other Rants/a. Her first book, a href=http://offthebeatensubwaytrack.comOff the Beaten (Subway) Track/a, is about unusual things to see and do in New York City./i/p

p/p p/p pbr /br /br /br /br /a href=http://womensvoicesforchange.typepad.com/.a/6a00d834519faa69e2010536a44015970c-piimg alt=Drpat class=at-xid-6a00d834519faa69e2010536a44015970c src=http://womensvoicesforchange.typepad.com/.a/6a00d834519faa69e2010536a44015970c-120wi //abr / By Patricia Yarberry Allen/p pIt is hard to find something that is good for the butt, brain biochemistry, balance both physical and spiritual, bra fat, back fat and burning off all those holiday calories.nbsp; I have found a new exercise program that does all this and more.nbsp; br /br /Boxing…that’s right, fighting.nbsp; I have been boxing with PJ for weeks now and am addicted to this boxing workout.nbsp; I tried boxing in the fall of 2007 when I got really mean and lean for my 60th birthday but I really stopped exercising in 2008.nbsp; This was a year where there was constant work, too much sorrow and no energy for exercise.nbsp; After Thanksgiving, I entered the ring again and have been working out to improve my muscle tone and balance, my aerobic capacity, my health and my mood. I do other kinds of exercise but boxing is certainly my favorite.br /br /I like any sport that involves new gear if it’s not too expensive.nbsp; I have fabulous Valentino Red Boxing Gloves made by a href=http://www.everlast.comEverlast./anbsp; Boxing gloves are sized by how much they weigh in ounces, not by finger length or palm size, so one size fits all.nbsp; The gloves range in size from 8-16 ounces, increasing in increments of 2 ounces.nbsp; br /br /a href=http://womensvoicesforchange.typepad.com/.a/6a00d834519faa69e20105369c279e970b-piimg alt=Boxingshoes class=at-xid-6a00d834519faa69e20105369c279e970b src=http://womensvoicesforchange.typepad.com/.a/6a00d834519faa69e20105369c279e970b-120wi //abr / Focus mitts are held by the trainer or your partner.nbsp; These come in one size fits all as well.nbsp; Everlast makes the mitts as well, as does a href=http://www.fairtex.comFairtex/a (whose gloves and mitts are made in Thailand and I am told are prized for the quality of the leather). And no outfit is complete without shoes (mine also come from Everlast).br /br /I started with the great a href=http://www.everlast.com/everlast-beginner-instructional-video.htmlinstructional videonbsp;/a “Everlast Boxing Beginner Instructional Video Boxing Workout”.nbsp; (There are other such videos made by a href=http://www.steeleboxer.com/video.htmSteeleboxer/a, a href=http://boxing.about.com/gi/dynamic/offsite.htm?zi=1/XJamp;sdn=boxingamp;cdn=sportsamp;tm=9amp;f=00amp;tt=2amp;bt=1amp;bts=1amp;zu=http%3A//www.rossboxing.com/thegym/thegym24.htmRossboxing/a and Titleboxing.com, though I can't vouch for them.) Soon I was learned from PJ the following essentials:br /emWarm up. Jump rope. Proper stance. Master the jab. Power punch and combinations. Always end with a stretch and cool down. br //embr /br /PJ has also taught me to:br /br /emJab /emwith my left hand and cross with my right handbr /emHook/em —stretching forcefully across the body to knock your opponent in the chin and knock him outbr /emUpper cut/em – this works the arms and latissimus dorsi, those pesky lats, and the illusive rear delts, and meanwhile it's another nifty way to get under the chin to knock your opponent out! The chin is apparently a very sensitive part of the body if you want to knock someone out.nbsp; Who knew?br /br /nbsp;/p p/p pBoxing is really hard work.nbsp; “Going up the hill and coming down the hill” with rapid fire jab and cross moves, along with fine feet work: that is a hell of an aerobic workout.nbsp; I finish with rapid fire punching using jabs and crosses.nbsp; I began with 30 seconds of this and can now do it for 90 seconds.nbsp; Doesn’t sound like very long?nbsp; Try it.br /br /If you add other martial arts into your routine, balance, leg strengthening and endurance are all improved.br /br /Fantasy is a big part of my Walter Mitty life so I get into the right mood for boxing with no trouble.nbsp; Just like poor Mr. Mitty, I don’t get out much, so this opportunity to be a contender is impossible for me to resist.nbsp; I see myself fighting back from sloth, fighting off gluttony, fighting in Madison Square Garden.br /br /As I am boxing, I imagine that I am wearing a special form fitting body suit like those worn by superheroes, only my colors will be those of our own a href=http://www.womensvoicesforchange.org: title=www.womensvoicesforchange.org:/a orange and white.nbsp; I am suddenly fighting for The New Menopause!nbsp; br /br /I think you get the general idea of hubris and narcissism that drives me generally and certainly has found a home in this new workout. So if you feel like fighting back from the holidays, and getting into shape for the New Year, put on the gloves and go get ‘em champ! Find your own enemies to conquer and focus on the chin. /p p/p

pPresident Obama and his transition team have invited all of us to a href=http://change.gov/pages/health_care_discussion_faq /discuss health care/a. /p pPlanned Parenthood is a href=http://change.gov/page/s/hcdiscussionleading a health care discussion group/a and is asking for your feedback. These are the questions Planned Parenthood is asking:/p blockquotep Based on your own experience, why is the issue of women’s health care important to you?/p pWhat do you perceive is the biggest problem women face in accessing the health care system?/p pWhere do you rank reproductive health in a discussion of health care reform? On a scale of 1 (lowest) – 10 (highest)/p pWhat has been your own experience in accessing reproductive health care?/p pBelow are examples of the types of preventive services Americans should receive. Have you gotten the preventive health care you need? Do you think these services should be included in primary health care services? What additional preventive care should be included?br / • birth controlbr / • breast and cervical cancer screeningbr / • sexually transmitted infection screening and treatmentbr / • sex education/p pWhat role do you see Planned Parenthood filling in providing primary and preventive health care? /p/blockquote pThese are the suggested questions from the a href=http://change.gov/pages/health_care_discussion_faq /Obama/Biden transition team/a (read the a href=http://change.gov/moderatorguidefull moderator guide pdf/a:/p blockquotep - What does the group perceive as the biggest problem in the health system?/p p- How do attendees choose a doctor or hospital? Where do attendees get information in making that decision? How should public policy promote quality health care providers?/p p- Have attendees or their family members experienced difficulty paying medical bills? How can policy makers address this problem?/p p-In addition to employer-based coverage, would the group like the option to purchase a private plan through an insurance-exchange or a public plan like Medicare?/p p- Did attendees know how much they or their employer pays for health insurance? What should employer’s role be in a reformed health care system?/p p- Were attendees familiar with the types of preventive services Americans should receive? Had attendees gotten the recommended prevention? If not, how can public policy help?/p p- How can public policy promote healthier lifestyles? /p/blockquote pa href=http://peacearena.org/2008/12/community-discussion-on-health-care-reform /Peace Arena/a blogged about the Oklahoma City event. Participate, if you're in the area!/p blockquotep All around the country Monday night, Americans will be coming together to discuss the coming changes to our health care system, and how we want to influence the degree and outcome of those changes. Thanks to the work of those who worked on the Obama campaign here, those in and near Oklahoma City will be participating in the national dialog./p/blockquote pHere's a snippet of a poem from a href=http://www.thehealthcareblog.com/the_health_care_blog/2008/12/my-health-car-1.htmlThe Healthcare Blog/a and I'm sorry I missed the gathering in the village North of Chicago./p blockquotep ‘Twas three nights before Christmas, and despite cold and stormbr / We’d gathered together to talk health care reform.br / Clutching Team Obama’s brief questionnairebr / We went over each item with scrupulous care.br / Middle-class, middle-aged and in the Midwestbr / With our host’s college kids for reality test.br / O’er the country many thousands had signed up for the samebr / Despite fear “special interests” would come rig the game.br / But as we plain folk gathered by the living room firebr / We closely read instructions, then vented our ire. /p/blockquote pWould you like to share your answers? You can do so here in the comments or you can blog your thoughts and send us a link. a href=http://www.change.orgChange.gov/a seems to allow people to create their own grassroots discussion groups and submit their findings using this a href=http://change.gov/page/s/hcdiscussreportform/a. Nice. Way to open up the discussion to all of the people and not just large organizations. /p pYou have until December 31, 2008 to hold a discussion or join a discussion. If you know of groups scheduled to meet over the next couple of days, please share the links and information, (I'm having trouble finding anyone publicizing their discussion groups or the ones I'm finding have already happened.)/p p~~Denisebr / a href=http://flamingohouse.netFlamingo House Happenings/a/p